How To Stop Wedding Stress From Wrecking Your Relationship

Weddings should be a celebration of love but all too often they can actually worsen the relationship. I know this first hand - I almost called off our wedding because the stress was really getting to me and affecting our relationship negatively. That’s because, in their modern incarnation, they’ve become major events and tremendously difficult to organize. There are so many expectations and things that you need to do.

The good news is that there are now a bunch of tried-and-test techniques out there that couples can use to bust wedding stress and just have a great day. Here’s what to do:

Prioritize What Matters

Before you begin planning your wedding, prioritize what matters to you, and what doesn’t. Ask yourselves whether you’re going to nitpick every detail or just have a basic wedding. If you set expectations early on, it helps to set the tone for the rest of the process. 

Some couples split wedding tasks into “must-have” and “nice to have.” This way, they have a better understanding of what is truly important to them, and what doesn’t quite matter as much.

Communicate More Effectively

According to research, lack of communication is the main issue driving wedding stress (and, interestingly, not just a lack of communication between the partners). In many cases, failure to communicate with the parents and other siblings drives conflict. 

According to wedding planning experts, communication is everything. Family arguments can easily erupt when people don’t effectively communicate with each other. Even small things can hurt their feelings, causing tensions and even fighting between the couple themselves. 

Offload Some Of The Responsibility To Vendors

Many couples believe that they need to be CEOs of their own weddings, planning everything out with military precision. However, those that experience the least stress always delegate. 

For instance, you don’t have to micromanage your photographer. As Matt Birchall Photography points out, professionals can simply follow your brief and implement it throughout the day. They don’t require constant oversight. 

If you're struggling to cope with the sheer number of people involved in your wedding, then you might want to hire a wedding manager. These professionals take responsibility by liaising with all relevant parties on your behalf, freeing you up to simply enjoy the day. 

Have A Plan B

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Weddings can be super stressful if you only have a plan A. That’s because there is no guarantee that things will work out how you intend. For example, it’s common for outdoor weddings to get rained off, even in the summer. If you have nowhere else to go, the entire event could be a washout. 

Spend Time On Self-Care

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In the run-up to the wedding, you can lose track of self-care. There’s just so much to do and think about that it becomes almost impossible to find time and space to focus on just you. 

Spending time on self-care, though, is essential. If you don’t, it can result in reduced libido, headaches, and even a reduction in your appetite. Some people even lose their hair over wedding stress: not a good look for the big day. 

Therefore, spend some time unwinding every day. Don’t allow wedding planning to dominate all your thoughts. 

Budget Friendly Bride 101 | Wedding Venue

Choosing the right venue is critical when wanting to create a mood for your day. In the midst of planning, I was asked one very important question and it helped me to shape my idea of what I want for my wedding day. I was asked “If you could only spend your money on three things for your wedding day, what would they be?” Hands down, my answer, was number one the venue! I want my guest share in the experience that I want to create.

Step 1: What experience do you want to create?

For me it’s important my guests are able to see and feel the love when they walk into our venue. I want romance and a room filled with candles. It was also important that I had the option of choosing to have our ceremony outdoors and coming inside for the reception. If you read part one; you know I really wanted a beach wedding but that became more than I bargained for.

Step 2: Research and Visit Venues

I spent countless hours researching wedding venues in my area and getting quotes and taking tours. It’s important to see the venue in person.  A place can look amazing online but not be what you want once you arrive. Also, remember you have a lot of talented photographers that can make a place look great but in reality it’s just okay. Also read reviews! Although everyone won’t leave a good review it’s nice to know what other people think about a place. You’ll find helpful information.

For example, a former bride wrote that the bathrooms were small and the venue provided nowhere for bridal party to get dressed. Although I really liked the venue that was a deal breaker for me. I refused to pay for a 12-hour rental and would not have the space to get ready.

Be sure to look out for additional fees; some places require a security fee if you’re serving alcohol or additional fees for bringing in an outside caterer.

Friendly Tip: No matter the place you choose you will most likely need an all-day rental.

Step 3: Decide if the venue fits into your budget

Although this should probably be your first thought before viewing venues; some will offer all-inclusive packages that making saying yes to a venue worthwhile and budget-friendly. Know your budget and stick to it. I believe it’s important to have two numbers in mind. What you want to pay and what you’re willing to pay.

I hope you find these tips to be helpful in your wedding planning journey.

Good luck and happy planning!

You're Engaged! Plot Your Next Move Right Now!

Getting engaged is one of the most fun and exciting things that can possibly happen in your life, and it is the moment so many of us look forward to. But, getting engaged is just the beginning, and provides a stop gap until you are finally married as a couple. So, you need to make sure you enjoy your engagement, but it is also important to ensure you plot your next move.

There are a lot of emotions that tend to run through your head when you become engaged, and each of them is perfectly understandable. But it’s knowing the best course of action to take next that is really important, because this is how you go about enjoying the process, as well as planning for the future too. 

Throw a Party to Show Off the Ring

Number one on your checklist simply has to be throwing yourselves an awesome engagement party. This is a joyous time, and one that should be celebrated by those nearest and dearest to you. It’s something that you need to make the most of right now, and there are so many things to factor in when you want to throw the perfect engagement party. Now, one of the key reasons to do this is to show off your ring, but first you may wish to know a little more about it. Make sure you click here to learn more about VVS diamonds so you can answer any quickfire questions about your ring!

Set Yourselves a Time Limit

One of the key things you need to keep in mind as a couple when it comes to getting engaged is to make sure you set yourselves a time limit. There are a lot of elements that play a part in this, and you are going to need to make sure you focus on making the most of this. Try to come up with ideas that will help you to get a definitive time limit set, and this is important. Choose a wedding date carefully, and ensure that you aim to have your wedding on that date. Nobody wants to be one of those couples who are engaged for five years or so. 

Start Planning Your Big Day

Now that you are engaged you can start making plans for the big day and your plan to tie the knot. You should have set a date in place so you have something to work towards, and there are loads of different components to deal with here, such as dress, rings, catering, guest list, table plans, venue, etc. It can all become a little overwhelming, so the best advice would be to hire a wedding planner in order to help make the most of this right now. 

Do as much as you can to make the most of this time as an engaged couple. There are a lot of things you need to keep in mind when it comes to having the right kind of engagement, and it largely depends on what works for you. Try to make sure you keep this in mind as much as possible, and there are a lot of things that play a part in helping with this.

Budget Friendly Bride 101 | Choosing Your Wedding Date

If you’ve stumbled upon this post, you are probably getting married, Yay! Congratulations! But let’s face it, what is the FIRST thing people love to ask once you announce your engagement, “When is the wedding?”. 

True Story: I did not choose my wedding date until 2 months after we were engaged. During the initial planning process the date changed several times. What we learned? Choose a date that you love and THEN also, pick a backup date!

Now, I HAVE to share what I’ve learned to help you choose your date and a cost effective one at that! Originally, I wanted a simple, beautiful seaside wedding and I assumed that for the time of year I wanted, it would be no big deal. WRONG!! I quickly learned that there are so many elements of a beach wedding (even on a low scale) that had NEVER crossed my mind! It became incredibly complicated and I backed away. I then realized that choosing the right time of year can save you A LOT of coins! 

Helpful Tip: If you’re considering a beach wedding, keep it small unless you have a designated space for your reception (i.e. hotel or offsite venue). Most beaches are open to the public and unfortunately, you cannot control your background as much as you would like. You may have to have a permit as well.

•••HERE•••

In our case, we thought it would be fun to turn our dating anniversary into our wedding date. Our dating anniversary is May 7 and May is prime time for weddings. To our surprise, we saw a huge up-charge on pricing and that simply was not in the budget. Our goal is to not be left with a tremendous amount of debt after the wedding so it was back to the drawing board! 

The Peak Season for wedding venues is generally April-June and September – October with of course some variations depending on where you live. Here in the south, we tend to favor more outdoor events and choose a wedding in late spring or early summer. However, if you are open to any date, consider choosing a date that is “off season”! You will quickly see that you will save at least $1,000 or more. You will also save big if you choose to do a weekday wedding.

It’s important to have more than one date. Wedding venues book quickly especially for peak season times.

We chose our date based on a few things:

1.     Time of year

2.     Important family obligations (birthdays, anniversaries, etc.)

3.     Pricing

Don’t forget, you also have to consider how long you want to plan your wedding. The average couple spends an average of 15 months planning for their wedding. 

Having a beautiful wedding can be done efficiently and economically! 

I hope you find this helpful and I can’t wait to hear all about your big day!

Stay tuned for part two on how to choose your venue!!